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Mapombi heard some people discussing about President Robert Mugabe's long stay in power and they were giving Biblical examples – and Mapombi was tempted to believe them.
They said the Good Lord made the people of Israel toil in the wilderness for 40 years before they reached Canaan, the land of honey and milk – they said 40 years is the maximum which God set for people to be in the wilderness before they are delivered.
I smiled and started soliloquizing as I counted the number of years Mugabe has been at the helm of this country and I got 37 years.  Thirty-seve good years of struggling under Mugabe leadership, three years shy of the number of years spent by the Israelites in the desert. We are almost getting there comrades and the truth is we will never surpass the maximum 40 years the Lord set in the Bible. Who knows maybe 2018 is the turning point!
But hope dzandiri kurota mazuva ano hadzina kumira zvakanaka varume maybe it is because of the cold weather asi dai maiva vamwe mainamata chokwadi. Chando chiriko hacho asi handimbofunga kuti ihope dzechando idzodzo. Can someone go to Magaya or Makandiwa kundopiwa muteuro -  a-ah by the way hausi muteuro it's anointing water tibatsirikane because ndiri kurota disaster chairo.
Haa can someone tell me kuti zvinombofamba seiko when a country with so learned people like Zimbabwe be run by someone who is almost losing all teeth due to old age? Shuwa kutongwa nechembere yava kutozara manyada mumuromo mese takangotarisa? You are lucky that I am a woman dai ndaiva murume chokwadi maichiona mind you handisi mbwende ka ini senge varume vari muZanu PF.
I am not a bootlicker and I will never lick one. Never! I am totally different from Mnangagwa, Chombo or uyu mudhara wekuenda nemuzukuru on government trip uyu is he Mboko or Mphoko? But Mapombi has never seen a coward person like the self-proclaimed Crocodile. Mukati ichokwadi kuti blazo uya akabhomba chitima imi? I doubt very much. Makore akawanda tichiudzwa kuti Joice akawisa chikopokopo chema Bhunu, tikangozonzwa zvonzi ahh ndezve nhema zviya. Saka rimwe gore tichahwa zvechitima zvorambwa futi….kkkkk, hameno.
Mapombi heard kuti kuhondo Ngwena was a mere bodyguard raMugabe just like Khaya-Moyo aibatira Nkomo briefcase. After all, is Mnangagwa really a Karanga? Mukaranga anobva hameno kupiko uko kuZvishavane uko? Hameno but the name does not sound Karanga at all!
Anyway, like I told you few weeks ago that Bona Mugabe will be soon joining active politics after she was appointed into the censorship board so that she could censor people like Mapombi vanotaura chokwadi about his father Bob.
But zvimwe zvinozonyanya vakomana this kind of nepotism baffles Mapombi big time. Because Bona is still young she really understands new media therefore she will help her mudhara by censoring the new media so that the people of Zimbabwe will not be able to freely express themselves on views about Mugabe's dictatorial tendencies. Really?
Mapombi heard a frightening dream – kashoma kurota zvisingaitike ini kubva ndichiri kacheche chaiko. Ndarota Bona achipinda muPolitburo meeting ini achinzi Youth League boss. I swear; I saw her in that dream sitting on the right side of her father Mugabe, while Grace was sitting on the left side in politburo ndikati baba vangu iwe zvino tapera. Mapombi can safely tell you that Bona will soon join the youth league guys musingade muchida. Aah muri kutobvunza kuti anenge abva nepi ko Grace akabva nepi? Anobva neikoko kwakabva Grace – kungomera sehowa kkkkkkkkk.
Imagine there will be three Mugabes sitting in the politburo kozoti muzukuru Zhuwao panenge pakaipa, hapana kana achati pwee. By the way Bona will be a doctor (PhD) soon ka. Ko zvinombonetsa here kana uri kuZanu PF kuita Dr – three months dzakatowandisa bvunzai Grace anokuudzai.
Mapombi can tell guys that Mugabe will soon reshuffle his politburo and cabinet to accommodate Bona and Chipanga respectively.  Yes, Chipanga will be rewarded with a ministerial post because akashanda mufana organising such rallies is not a joke.
By the way, Mugabe is coming to Mucheke Stadium next week on June 30. You will see how our council will run around kugadzirisa maroad and Zesa ichigadzirisawo malights kkkkkkk murume uya ndofunga une garudzo ini chete. Makaona zvakasara zvaita roads kwaMutare here kkkkkkk wish Mugabe visits Masvingo every month chokwadi inosara yava kuyevedza senge kwaZvimba.
Mapombi is afraid Mugabe will officially re-open that ICT centre at Chikato Post Office nekukanganwa kuti he once officially opened it in December. Ko zvinozikanwa here ndivoka vakamboverenga speech yavakamboverenga gore riye. Hopefully someone will remind him kuti makamboivhura zvakare in December.
Did you ever notice kuti the old man now clearly supports one of the factions? Hanzi wakati the next leader should be a Karanga ndiani? Tisu tiri kudaro Cde nguva yareba muchidya mega ikoko kuHarare chimbotipaiwo mukana musaita senge ndimi mega makaenda kuhondo apo. Aah vanhu vepi kusainyara!
Anyway, it's almost lunch time guys let me go ndindokanga hangu maputi angu for lunch but musarega vanhu vachitijairira mhani avo. We should tell them pavanouya ipapa kuti you overstayed your welcome Cdes. Before I go, can someone remind Mphoko to bring at least two incubators to donate to the youths here in Masvingo and few chicks of course. Kkkkkkk haa Mphoko pane basa chairo.
Regai ndinyarare zvangu otherwise ndingavingwa kuno kwaDr Grace Mugabe Trading Centre ndikaswera ndofurufushwa hangu ko ndivo vayeka vekuenda kumaPolice camp ava. Mboko imboko!mapombi

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