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» » Of the Pfeerorists and Nerorists


The fulcrum of this week's Mapombi Adonha edition… kkkkkk I mean the pith of it! Umm Mapombi didn't know that even judges vanogona kutovharwawo nechirungu ini.  Justice Malaba had a difficult time understanding Advocate Thabani Mpofu's fulcrum and pith diction.
Now I understand even if the MDC Alliance loses this case; probably it would be because the judges failed to understand the terminology used by its lawyers. Even Mapombi had a difficult time here at Chitima Market trying to simplify and interpret for my inferior educated friends.
I had to spend the whole day without eating rotten bananas and maputi as I did the interpreting work, ko ndogodiiko madzisahwira angu asina kudzidza. They don't even understand the fulcrum of the whole story. I mean the pith of it hahahahahahaha ndokukuvadzai nevheti mukaita zvekutamba.
Apologies to my avid readers, I'm usually not like this when I write but today ndakatobatwa nemweya waAdvocate Mpofu chaiwo. I don't mean to confuse you as Mpofu did to Chief Justice but kungotiwo that is the jargon I sometimes use. My apologies, please.
Mapombi is not a lawyer by the way, but of course I'm learned, and I can tell you that this case iri pachena iyi. I don't want to preempt but it's the simplest of all. I know the Nerorists want a favourable result, and so do the Pfeerorists. But there is no way the judges can make you all happy comrades; let us all be prepared to accept the judgment.
But did you see ziso ranga richibudiswa naMangwana of Zanu? I was tempted to think that Cde vakarohwa newhisky ini. Apa mazino akasungwa newaya kkkkkkkk zvandombooneswa ini Mapombi ka zvakaoma. Chete chakaona hama hachisekwe hacho.
Mapombi is a gentleman handivanze hangu; I know many of Nelson Chamisa supporters (Nerorists) will accuse me kuti ndatengwa but I'm simply stating facts. Advocate Mpofu was on point but ndangoonawo sekuti evidence ishoma zvangu. Hey, I'm not saying MDC Alliance will lose the case but ndiri kungoti ndaona sekuti evidence ishoma compared to facts.
But Zanu yacho yakatotsvawo futi, at least the judge was helping by asking leading questions. Zanu needs to win this at all costs. By the way did I tell you that Sekuru Hungwe said I'm not going anywhere? Kkkkkk he said Mapombi Adonha anopenga he wants me to retire kuti ndadii tell her I'm not going anywhere. Handiende zvekumhanya!
But the guy is now too old but he insists I'm still fit. Hanzi I was joking zvangu and Mapombi took it serious that I will retire soon after elections.  But I once said this; if Hungwe retires I will go back kwedu kumusha kwaChirimudombo uko and I will stay there for good. Now that he said he is not going anywhere, then I will also remain here eating rotten bananas and maputi angu asina nzungu.
From the look of things tichatomboramba zvedu tichidya maputi and rotten bananas isu vana Mapombi because things might be tight for the next five years. Maiwe zvangu with these Nerorists zvondoita sendicharohwa; I'm just saying from the way things are proceeding at our ConCourt chete.
But I'm beginning to think lawyers enjoy confusing people with these terms; Nero said if the judgment is not in our favour we will unleash the forces of peace and make this country ungovernable. Mapombi is still wondering what kind of these peaceful forces the opposition will unleash – I would want to believe these will be peaceful protests and demonstrations. Because we say no to violence. Mhirizhonga hatidi.
But if they are going to unleash forces of peace then no problem. That will be only after the judgement.
Anyway, it's almost lunch time let me go ndinokanga zvangu maputi angu for lunch izvi zvana fulcrum and pith handingazvikwanisa. If Malaba just said okay for the sake of moving forward what more iniwo zvangu Mapombi wakadzidza kuMasvingo Mashava uko ndingazvinzwisisa.
Before I go, is it difficult to have an inclusive government? Is it painful to have a government of national unity? Kana zvisingarwadze ko kuzviita zvingadii? People are suffering ladies and gentlemen and this winner take all mentality must stop.
We want leaders who at least have people near their hearts; because I know there is no way a politician can have people at heart, never kuti zvadii.
Mapombi can't wait to hear from uncle Bob; im sure mukoma Jealousy Mawarire will organise a presser soon. Of late I liked uncle Bob zvangu because vava kuzvitaura zvandaingotaurawo when he was still ruining this country.
Now that he is talking the same language with the majority of Zimbabweans, we pardoned him and he is now one of us. Ko inga Bhaibheri rinoti regereranai pakutadza kwenyu.
But nhai mukoma Jealousy isn't it possible to also have Mphoko at Mugabe press conferences? I miss that tall old man – he was an inspiration to many women. Donating chicks and incubators to women across the country is one thing Mphoko will be surely remembered for. Mboko imboko!mapombi

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