I have heard your cries and Iistened to your concerns dear readers. Mapombi being a listening President ahhh sorry I mean to say writer, I have decided to avail myself to you every week. Some may say Mapombi has become over ambitious to dream of being the President of this country but I ask why not? Varume varatidza kuti havazvigoni izvi. It’s time for Mapombi to take over. This country now needs a mother’s touch. Madzimai muriko here uko. It has been hectic for Mapombi to be consistent over the past months because of this lockdown but ikozvino tsamba yavapo mutown muya ndakupinda manje. Zimbabwe is said to have an over 90% unemployment rate but tsamba dzine vanhu dzekwavanoshanda unoshaya kuti zviri kufamba sei kkkk. Covid-19 yakaunza mabasa here. Munhu wese ane tsamba yekubasa woshaya kuti saka vanhu vanochemei. Regai Zanu itonge because payakangoti lockdown, munhu wese atova nebasa overnight kkkk.
Mapombi does not have a roof over her head because our beloved city fathers have destroyed kumba kwangu kuChitima. Vakaputsa putsa misika yose zvekuti chero mabanana akaora hakuchina kana rimwe. Unfortunately I do not have a mobile phone I could have told our Finance minister Mthuli Ncube to send me some of the Covid money iya yainzi inopihwa kune vanotambura. Did anyone receive that money by the way? The last I checked I heard Mthuli chichiti kwaita some data capture errors what what after chamboti they used a sophisticated algorithm to capture the data of the beneficiaries. Saka what was sophisticated ipapa nhai Mthuli. I do not want to waste my time on this man otherwise blood pressure yangu will go up. Unfortunately for us, all those big words from Mthuli’s goofy mouth taste so sweet in the ears of our beloved President Cde Commander -in-Chief Dambudzo Mnangagwa. Mthuli lies so much and Mnangagwa listens and takes notes. What is wrong with you iwe Emmerson. Please wake up and smell Mthuli’s lies. People hate you Mr President mostly because of the acts of the people surrounding you. Dismiss Mthuli today and I guarantee you that 2023 you will not have to campaign, victory will be guaranteed. Mufaro wakaitwa nevanhu muna November paya pamakaita coup unodarikwa if you fire Mthuli. Thank me later Emmerson.
I hear a lot of people saying we were better off under the white man’s rule but Mapombi respectfully differ. Ava veganda jena are the worst people to even admire. Dear black people, a white man will never like you and will never be your equal. A white man may pretend to like you but to them you will always be monkeys. Get that into your minds you people. Mnangagwa and his team have failed us yes but never ever wish the white man was better. We have to liberate ourselves from Zanu PF’s greediness and thievery. This is the only problem we have found ourselves in. Zvenyu zvekuchemera varungu handidi kana kuzvinzwa. Our fathers suffered under the white man’s rule which is why they decided to take up arms against them. A lot of people died and we remember them as we commemorate Heroes Day. Unfortunately Zanu PF lost the plot. They feel this country is theirs and they can do whatever they want. If we stop corruption I can bet my last rotten banana that Africa will be a jewel. We will make this country and continent free and beautiful. We will create better opportunities for everyone. We have the human resources to develop Africa but in the promise of better things, brutes have risen to power. They kill and torture their people. Freedom of expression has been criminalised. Soldiers have been unleashed on innocent civilians. A difference in opinion is labelled a dark force or a terrorist by ED and his goons. Our generation is too cowardly to confront this enemy and our only hope is Covid-19. Famba corona tiyambuke kkkk.
Mnangagwa and his Zanu PF should know that there is God in heaven. You may have guns protecting you but when the messenger of death visits you, no gun or soldier will save you. When Covid-19 comes, no amount of fire power will save you. Famba corona tiyambuke. Shiri never thought he would die one day but he died of Covid-19, at least that’s what we have been told or made to believe. What killed him does not matter but what is important is that he died and he will not be missed. What he did during the liberation struggle was heroic but he lost the plot and turned his guns on his people during what became known as the moment of madness. For that we say good riddance. May God do you justice Cde Shiri. We hope Covid-19 will send many of your comrades wherever you are. Dear God please spare the innocent civilians from the jaws of Covid but unleash the full wrath of this pandemic on our tormentors. Zimbabwean lives matter Cdes. Kana zvikarema ndoita nharo dzaMalema kkkk. But muchinda uya anonzi Malema is a hot head chaiyo. He is fighting our struggle across the Limpopo and we are very grateful. But Zimbabweans are so foolish sometimes. We are very good at keyboard activism. Zimbabwean lives matter yes but social media will not bring the change we need. Malema may stand with us but he will not deliver the change we seek. Mnangagwa will not lose sleep over a hashtag on Twitter. Mr President musavhundutswa neTwitter henyu imi. Nyatsai kuti zete zvenyu pachigaro chenyu chinoera. It is not well within Zanu PF but our people fail to exploit this weakness. There is a cold war brewing in Zanu PF and its getting warmer. Ikozvino Chiwenga dzakaitwa minister of health kkkk what a joke.
What does Chiwenga know about health? Hydroxychloroquine anoizva here Chiwenga. Asi ED usadaro uri munhu wekuziva. Chiwenga may be your rival but there was no need to expose him like that. Why the health ministry? Do you want him to fail so that we blame him for what’s coming because Covid-19 haisati yatanga nesu. The health sector has deteriorated and you decided to send someone whose health is worse to lead such a critical ministry under this prevailing situation. I hear vamwe vachiti Chiwenga dzine doctorate refashion and fabrics kkkkk musadaro imi vanhu, respect the former general. To all nurses and doctors, hokoyo nenhamo. This is the man who said you are skilled rebharazi and he will not hesitate to hire and fire you if you are found wanting. I bet ED send Chiwenga to be on the frontline of this Covid situation so that Covid will deal with him. Remember Covid haitambisi those with underlying conditions and Chiwenga has plenty kkkk. I am yet to see anyone in Zanu PF asina an underlying condition so watch out. I have said enough regai ndinokanga maputi angu for lunch but before I go I would like to welcome back chikomana Chamisa from leave. Chakambochema mai vacho chikomana ichi and now he is back just like Mapombi. I hope Chamisa has had time to think of strategies to deal with Zanu PF during his sabbatical. Mboko imboko.